This weekend has been crazy, especially as I still hadn’t recovered from Wednesday. For those of you who haven’t seen the photos, they can now be found here, thanks to the wonderfully talented David Marriott.
On Friday evening, Steve, a fellow W3 class mate had his Jazz dissertation concert at Fairfield Church. I’ll be honest, and confess that I went more out of duty than will. But it was good to get out for a bit! I had to make a swift exit, as I knew I needed to get to bed early-ish to survive the weekend!
Fortunately the 10-6 rehearsal with All Souls Orchestra on Saturday, was reduced to just the afternoon (as on Thursday it was decided we didn’t need the Strings only morning rehearsal). I drove to Finchley in the morning, due to some interesting logistics! I got into London and met friends for lunch on All Souls steps.
Again, as soon as we started playing, I just felt so different, so natural, so enjoyable, so in love with music. I picked up 25 FREE tickets for the Arena on Saturday, to give to LST folks.
I had to leave the rehearsal at just gone 4pm in order to meet Dave at Euston for him to ‘cello sit for the weekend… and let him have the tickets, too, to offer to folks from his church, which ended up being much more popular than he thought they would!
I got the train from Euston to Wilmslow, during which time I battled with God over this job; since last Wednesday I don’t want it, really! But if God wants me there, then… I also called Dad and Ed, (the NSGSO cello tutor in Birmingham) to catch up, as I haven’t filled him in since November, when I was really ill!
I was met by Simon, the Vicar when I arrived at Wilmslow station. He seemed nice enough, but I was initially intimidated by him. I had dinner with him and his wife, Dede, we chatted about various things, they seemed more interested in my parents narrowboat than my musical interests! Later that evening, I met Sarah, their daughter, she is currently working in her gap year before going to Cambridge uni, she’s lovely!
The vicarage was so cold, I was glad I’d had to pack my only clean PJ’s, which were my ‘winter’ ones! When I woke up on Sunday morning, I wanted to go home, I don’t want the job! How could I get through the day like that?
I must have dreamed that Simon said that the Bible used in their church was the New Kings James Version and that their main source of music was the English Hymnal! So, I was somewhat relieved to find they use the NIV and Mission Praise!
The morning service aided the idea of the job to grow on me. I met another candidate and his fiencee who were lovely. The church are thinking of having two Ministry Trainees this year, so we weren’t in competition with each other 
)
I went to a couple’s house for lunch, which was a little strange as the husband would interject a natural conversation with slightly awkward questions! I was explaining my testimony and he was jumping ahead the whole time! When we got onto the subject of female preaching we had some nice awkward silences! They explained how as a church, they believe that women have different, not lesser, roles in the church, and that this is very clear in Scripture. To which I thought maybe they should update their NIV’s to TNIV’s!
They were very enthusiastic about the North West Ministry Course, explaining how in the mornings the course goes through the Bible, puts everything in context in the ‘big picture’ to which I thought, ‘so, first term at LST, then!’ The afternoons are more practically orientated, giving opportunity to preach (I need to check where they stand on the women thing!) and how to lead small groups and deal with pastoral issues. All of these things I would gain from, as doing the Music course at LST I have missed that side of it…
I then met with the two church wardens, which was a much more natural conversation. I asked them about the role of women thing, they affirmed what the other couple had said, but insisted that I would be able to teach the woman’s groups and suchlike, it’s just that I wouldn’t be allowed to preach to the whole church family.
It was then time for my official interview with the Vicar. 10 minutes in, he asked me about the 4 theories of Atonement! My mind went blank and I somehow managed to waffle about not having come to a firm conclusion yet myself… but I do remember thinking ‘eek, potentially another hour and a half of this!’ It wasn’t all bad, we chatted more about my degree, about worship, about sexuality and how the church can respond to these issues. We talked about music and although he confessed he isn’t a musician, he encouraged me that I would be able to have time for cello lessons and maybe an orchestra. We too talked again about the women in ministry issue!
He explained to me how the training would work, and although it’s not an accredited course as such, he recommends it. The current Ministry Assistant is an Oak Hill graduate, and he gained a lot from this course, even though he’d been to Oak Hill (to which Dave Marriott reminded me that Oak Hill isn’t LST… so…!)
I then had chance to chat with the current Ministry Assistant, Paul, and his wife, who was very heavily pregnant, due last week! It was nice to see the flat, but if the church decide to have two Ministry Assistants for next year, it’d automatically be given to the guy and his wife-to-be! Which, in all fairness would be better for me personally to be lodging with people, rather than being in a flat on my own! Paul said how excited the church were when they found out a female was interested in the post, as it would mean that I could potentially mentor some of the girls in the youth, which Paul has been doing with the guys…
The evening service was more relaxed than the morning. There was a larger music group, including a cellist and a violin player. I feel the music group has much potential!
Wilmslow is beautiful, I cannot deny that. And it’s position in relation to the Peak District, and even North Wales and the Lakes is desirable. It only takes 30 minutes to get into Manchester, where I am sure I’d be able to find a cello teacher.
My attitude towards the job actually made the day bearable, in that I wasn’t really nervous, or checking everything in my head, I was just myself!
Interviews are just as much for the interviewee to see the place, as to be interrogated by the interviewers!
But;
I want to play the Cello.
It’s not London.
I have no connections in Manchester, bar one.
I don’t know how hard I’d find their view on women in Ministry?
Do I want to be their first female Ministry Trainee?
If the other guy didn’t come, would I be happy living in a flat on my own?
I wouldn’t be paid enough to save towards pursuing Music College later, especially if I were to have cello lessons and still be on the amount of Nutritional Therapy supplements I’m on now!
I want to go to Music College, or do a performance masters.
There aren’t many people in the church in the 20-30′s age group, but I’d probably get over that.
I feel so incredibly torn. If they do offer me the position, I’m going to have to do some serious thinking.
On the train home on Monday morning, I began to get a migraine, which was horrible. By the time I got into Finchley, where Dave met me at the station, I was feeling rubbish and needed to sleep! Dave is incredible, he let me sleep on his bed again, and woke me up to eat food. I cried; I felt so crap. I am so torn about the future. I’m so scared about the next few weeks at LST; how am I going to survive them? He held me and let me cry. I felt bad as I couldn’t stomach a bacon sandwich which he’d just made me, so he made me soup and ate the bacon sandwich himself! And then he sent me on my way home to Northwood, after going via the church to pick up my cello, at which point he complemented my driving, which was lovely!
I received a phone call on Wednesday from Simon, informing me that they want to take up my references before making a final decision, which I guess is a good sign?
I just want closure on it, though.
